Southern California beaches have the nicest sand!

That Is Not Appropriate, MRJEFF.

(Apologies to the Schiavo family and the Schindler family of Florida, and the Bueller family of Illinois)

Popstrology: What's Your Sign?

1970 - The Year of the Jackson 5
Sep 13-Oct 3 - Diana Ross "Ain't No Mountain High Enough"

"The popstrological end of the Beatles, the Supremes, and Simon and Garfunkel signaled the end of an era in 1970, but the sudden and powerful impact of the Jackson 5 provided an optimistic, sugar-funk injection to a year ripe with potential causes of mopery (viz. the aforementioned breakups; Kent State; the deaths of Janis Joplin and Jimi Hendrix). Still, the biggest stars rarely burn out without first casting off some of their energy into the pop universe. Indeed, in 1970 we see the first solo appearances of former Supreme Diana Ross and former Beatle George Harrison, heralding the birth of a brand-new popstrological grouping: the constellation Spin-Off, an entity known to inspire the kind of ambivalence that comes with realizing that while life may always go on, we sometimes know that the best is already behind us. Like the Jackson 5 themselves, the micro-generation born in this pivotal year may exhibit enormous gifts at a tender age. But the bright lights of youthful success can unmooor even the greatest of talents, so take heed, children of 1970, and never forget that for every Michael, there is also a Jermaine. Not to mention a Tito. "

3.4

Earthquake! The unbridled fury of an angry Earth, unleashed upon an unsuspecting public!

Charles + Maribel

Ah, l'amour. Your pal MRJEFF attended a co-worker's wedding on Saturday. The groom's family was conservative Orange County-types; the bride's family, working class Mexican immigrants. The happy couple are twenty-something punks who met at a concert.

I ♥ America.

How To Lie With A Bar Graph

Look! The Democrats are NINE TIMES as likely to want to remove the feeding tube as are Republicans and Independants! The picture proves it!

(inspired by the wonderful How To Lie With Statistics)

Update 3/22/05 12:15pm: I also posted this on del.icio.us, and now it's been noticed at Media Matters; Atrios and Josh Marshall have linked to the Media Matters post. (It's clear from those sites' comments that many people noticed this on their own.)

---

UPDATE UPDATE!!! Media Matters says that "CNN has updated its graphic after the posting of this item." Of course, Gentle Reader, you know the real reason, but we'll let Mr. Brock believe what he wants.

In Which MRJEFF Purchases a Bottle of Diet Pepsi At Lunchtime and Wins One Free Song From the ITunes Music Store

The code: RFR4A TZOLH
The song: Seal's Killer (William Orbit Remix) (iTunes link)

Tales from Highway 99

"I can tell Modesto from Merced, but I have visited there, gone to dances there; besides, there is over the main street of Modesto and arched sign which reads:

WATER WEALTH CONTENTMENT HEALTH

There is no such sign in Merced."

- Joan Didion, "Notes From a Native Daughter"


The Modesto Arch

MRJEFF's Language Korner

Word Of TheDay: Blepherospasm.

EARTHQUAKE!

At 8:09 this evening your pal MRJEFF felt a small but sharp jolt that, to his Southern California-sharpened senses could mean only one thing -- an earthquake! Or a big truck driving past. (It wasn't a truck.)

Anyhoo. In this great Computer Age we're living in, the USGS keeps track of earthquakes online, and the public can report in on local tremblers (this one is Event 10083305, a 2.9 on the Richter scale, centered near Encino.)

All Earthquakes in California-Nevada Map Area for the past week (note that some "quakes" are suspected quarry explosions!)
Event 10083305: ZIP Map (who felt it, and how strong)

Terrible Two

Well, I've wished El Rashomono a Happy Anniversary and whatnot. After all, it was he who reminded me that I had created this little free thingy-mc-doodle some months earlier, and who provided me with just enough peer pressure to post at least once a month (whether I had material or not!)

Anyhoo, I've spent too much time concentrating on Audioscrobbler/Last.fm and del.icio.us, and not enough on Mister Jeff Dot Blogspot lately. (For whatever that's worth.) Anyhoo, I got another blog post out of this, and that's OK.

Benn loxo du taccu

A wonderful African music mp3 blog: Matt Yanchyshyn's Benn loxo du taccu. You won't be disappointed!

Garzón

Three bitchin' kickass pop songs and a video, from Spanish pop trio Garzon. Sadly, I don't understand their crazy moon language, but they get extra bonus points for the Creative Commons license.
via búscate un novio, who also turned me on to mid-eighties French pop-punk band Les Calamités and to Bradley's Almanac's mp3s of Velocity Girl (among others) at 1992's Sub Pop music festival Vermonstress.

"A Good Friend Has Left Us"

James Randi, on Johnny Carson's death.

Ancient Chinese Secret

You learn something new every day!

Wait...what???

All I was doing was looking up the newly released DVD of Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle. Who would have thought this horrible aberration would come up?


...



image courtesy of Beards of the Web. Blog entry title courtesy of Tracey Meyers.

New Quarter Friday

Wisconsin: a cow, a cheese, and an ear of corn. Might be old hat to you, but today I got two of 'em. "Forward," indeed!

Basho would be proud

comics haiku

Language Log

You never know just what you'll find through Fark. A thread about an anti-Hmong bumper sticker contains, deep within, a link to a University of Pennsylvania-based blog about the English language.

Beautiful Day / Amazing

Free Music Monday! Two songs from Beth Sorrentino, of the late, lamented suddenly, tammy!

Christmas is coming!

And Amazon.com has just the thing to help you pass those long winter nights.

"The Criterion Collection Holiday 2004 Gift Set consists of all of their published DVDs through October 2004 (except for the out-of-print editions): that's 241 titles on 282 discs and includes a Certificate of Authenticity." The whole package is a mere $4999 (discounted 33% from the list of $7500).

(6 people recommended Police Academy - The Complete Collection instead of The Criterion Collection Holiday 2004 Gift Set.)

Lord, deliver us from your followers

Josh Marshall notes some recent frothings from the fetid soul of noted right-wing "Christian" James Dobson:

“Homosexuals are not monogamous. They want to destroy the institution of marriage,” Dobson said.

“It will destroy marriage. It will destroy the Earth.”

Black Wednesday

"The people have spoken...the bastards."
- Morris Udall, 1976

"Was Darwin Wrong?"

 
"NO."

- National Geographic, Nov. 2004

I felt it, for once!

NBC 4 - News - Small Earthquake Rattles Los Angeles Area

LOS ANGELES -- A small earthquake rattled areas of West Los Angeles on Saturday but there were no reports of damage or injuries.

The magnitude-2.7 temblor occurred at 9:07 a.m. and was felt from West Hollywood to Culver City, according to the U.S. Geological Survey Web site.

It was centered a mile west-northwest of West Hollywood and three miles north-northeast of Century City.

There were no reports of damage or injuries.

Hideously Strong

A MRJEFF3000 operative dropped by the local Rite-Aid earlier today and came across something too interesting to pass up: Liquorice Altoids.

(Insert licorice flashback here)

The press release gushes:

Reminiscent of its British heritage, Altoids, the Curiously Strong Mints®, is proudly introducing Liquorice Altoids® to their esteemed line of mints. This bittersweet new addition to the celebrated line of mints delivers the same aromatic intensity and authentic flavor expected from Altoids. Available in the ubiquitous reclosable metal box, new Liquorice Altoids will stand apart from the other breath-fresheners with a striking black and gold tin that uses stripes on the face of the lid for the first time.

"Liquorice is an old-world flavor with an enormous following of people with discriminating tastes for powerful and sophisticated flavors," said Brand Director, Altoids. "It makes perfect sense for Altoids to introduce a power mint that is both curiously strong, reminiscent of our British roots and a favorite among liquorice and fresh breath aficionados."

Possibly. I guess this could appeal to that niche market, the one that likes the idea of candy, but wishes it wasn't so darn edible.

Moose on the Loose!

(courtesy Bert and Marie, Anchorage, Alaska)

"Kerry waxed Bush's ass."

The October 8 Bush-Kerry debate, as seen by Wonkette (and Dad Wonkette).

Pearls of wisdom...

The October 8 Bush-Kerry debate, as seen by the dittoheads of Free Republic.

Osama Surprise!

"He let us down."

   The re-election of George W. Bush would be a mandate to continue on our present course of chaos. We cannot afford to double the debt that we already have. We need to be moving in the opposite direction.
   John Kerry has 30 years of experience looking out for the American people and can navigate our country back to prosperity and re-instill in America the dignity she so craves and deserves. He has served us well as a highly decorated Vietnam veteran and has had a successful career as a district attorney, lieutenant governor, and senator.
   Kerry has a positive vision for America, plus the proven intelligence, good sense, and guts to make it happen.
   That’s why The Iconoclast urges Texans not to rate the candidate by his hometown or even his political party, but instead by where he intends to take the country.

   The Crawford, Texas Iconoclast, George W. Bush's hometown newspaper, has endorsed John Kerry for President.

Masterful...(see it now)

So, the other day I'm over at Salon. As you no doubt are aware, they rely on a "day pass" -- a commercial that you have to watch in order to unlock that day's content -- to maintain profitability. This day's sponsor was Olive Films' Notes From Underground. Ordinarily, I ignore the ad until it's over and I can click into the content I really want to see. But for some reason one critic's quote caught my eye:

"Masterful...(see it now) - Matt Langdon, Film Threat

Hey, I thought. I wonder if Matt knows that he's been blurbified. So I dutifully made a screen grab and emailed it to Everyone's Favorite Underrated Movie Critic, and he has helpfully provided the Secret Origin of his quote.

...

Of course, a little attribution would be nice.

This is because I went out to lunch with my staff on the day you dropped by, isn't it? It was Roger's birthday, dammit! What was I supposed to do?

Sartre & Peanuts

Charlie Brown, existentialist.

3hive - sharing the sharing

Many nice indie mp3 downloads linked at 3hive. I know what I'm going to be doing this morning.

Golden Gate Garrison Gallery :: Calkins Wedding - Children's Fairyland Oakland, CA - Aug. 1, 2004

Best. Wedding. Ever.

Not Good.

Okay, bad: SEOUL (Reuters) - A huge explosion rocked an area in North Korea near the border with China three days ago and appeared to be much bigger than a train blast that killed 170 people in April, Yonhap news agency reported on Sunday.

UPDATE: well, at least everyone is saying it's not nuclear...

2 Leias!

LAY, LADY LEIA: Fisher, left, and her stunt double take a sand-dune sunbath aboard a space vehicle during a break on the Yuma, Ariz., location for Return of the Jedi in 1982

(stolen from TIME magazine)

Bad Way to Start the Day

I know I won't be leaving here...

The other morning I heard on KCRW's Morning Becomes Eclectic what I assumed was, due to some sort of rip in the space-time continuum, a cover version of Franz Ferdinand's "Take Me Out", as performed by Elton John, circa 1972. Later, I found out that it was, in fact, a Scissor Sisters cover of the song, from 2004. No matter. Still good fun.

Fugly, Fugly, Fugly!

Go Fug Yourself is the new Defamer. Or Supermodel Personals. Or something.

Hero?

I saw the new Zhang Limou/Jet Li movie Hero on Saturday. It's certainly one of the most beautiful films I've ever seen. And the acting was quite good, and the fights were spectacular, if overlong and overmany.

But.

At the end the whole film took a decidedly disturbing turn, one which seems to endorse the current Communist regime's brutal repression of dissent in China. Joshua Tanzer, in his review at OFFOFFOFF, also notices this ugly political message.

Plenty of people will just sit back and enjoy the fast-paced action, charismatic actors and lush colors of "Hero," so why get stuck on this one issue? Well, this question about how to respond to pro-fascist film has been around almost as long as film itself — we still debate the merits of the pro-slavery "Birth of a Nation" and the pro-Nazi "Triumph of the Will." (I would even throw in the less overtly pro-Jim Crow "Gone with the Wind.") And the answer is that films help shape our visual, psychological and intellectual instincts, and this is a film that teaches beauty, violence and authoritarianism at once. A beautiful film that exalts killing opponents of the state is a beautiful parchment on which is written, in the most elegant calligraphy, a manifesto for evil.

(hero)


8/31 update: Two readers' letters to salon.com about Salon's review of Hero

...and Jerry Mathers as Robin, the Boy Wonder.

Mike Sterling's Progressive Ruin has a rather amazing find: two comics fans' letters, published in JLA #17 (July 1963), casting a hypothetical JLA movie.

---

Dear Editor: I think that the Justice League of America ought to be in the movies. Here are my ideas about who should play who:

     Aquaman - Troy Donahue
     Wonder Woman - Carole Wells (with black wig)
     Flash - Edd Byrnes
     Batman - Vince Edwards
     Green Arrow - Bobby Darin
     Snapper Carr - John Ashley
     Martian Manhunter - Gordon Scott (with make-up)
     Superman - Efrem Zimbalist
     Green Lantern - Roger Smith
     Atom - Michael Landon (with help of trick photography)

Jim Dismukes, 2141, Walz Drive, Savannah Ga.

(How's this for a remarkable coincidence - which really happened, as contrasted to a fictional one that no one would ever believe: in the same mail, we received two letters -- both from Georgia -- suggesting a cast of characters to portray the JLA in the movies! We offer them both for our readers to compare and deliberate over. -- Editor)

***

Dear Editor: I like the JLA so much that you should have them in the movies. Let me know how you feel about my selections:

     Green Lantern - Edd Byrnes
     Flash - Troy Donahue
     Martian Manhunter - Steve Reed
     Wonder Woman - Tuesday Weld
     Green Arrow - ?
     Aquaman - Lloyd Bridges
     Atom - Dean Martin
     Batman - Robert Taylor
     Superman - ?
My original choice for Green Arrow was Clark Gable, but he has since passed on. And I can't think of anyone to replace the late George Reeves in the role of Superman.

Joe B. Allen,
350 Altoona Place, SW, Atlanta 10, Ga.

A Letter to the New York Times

Sir -
In your story, The Boys From "South Park" Go To War I came across the following passage: "His partner, Mr. Stone, glumly agreed: 'We're so dumb.' (Except that he added a four-letter word. Many of their sentences include four-letter words.)" Later, we read, "'We hate both of them,' Mr. Parker confirmed. 'They're both retards. We have to choose between a' — four-letter word — 'sandwich and a' — same four-letter word — 'sandwich.' O.K., so they're not exactly nuanced." And finally, "'It's just a dumb puppet movie.' (Except he added a four-letter word.)"

Which four-letter word do you mean? I do like to consider myself well-versed in most current obscenities, profanities and vulgarities. But the only term I find it likely that Messrs Stone and Parker would have used, in each instance, the adjective form of the legendary "F-word", is seven letters. So I went and checked my copy of The New York Times Manual of Style and Usage. Under the entry for "obscenity, profanity, vulgarity" I read the following:

The Times also forgoes offensive or coy hints. An article should not seem to be saying, "Look, I want to use this word, but they won't let me." Generally that principle rules out telltale strings of hyphens or dashes (The prosecutor is full of ----). Editors may sparingly allow paraphrase of a term, if it truly sheds light on a serious question. But a phrase like the legendary barnyard expletive, ambiguous about the animal to which it alludes, may raise questions as distracting as those it answers.

(You do have a copy, right?)

If there is a new four-letter adjective obscenity, profanity, or vulgarity that the Hollywood in-crowd is using, I think it is the Times's obligation - nay, duty! - to inform the American public.

C'mon, at least give us a hint...

Yours,
MRJEFF3000

PS -- "Blame Canada" was not so much the theme of the South Park series, as it was of the movie, South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut.

Eagle Rock, Topanga State Park

All the cool bloggers hang out at Eagle Rock in Topanga State Park...

Super Special Bonus Secret Extra Credit Questions: Who's that fellow in the white T-shirt in the foreground? And what the heck has he got on his head?

Danny Boy

News from the mysterious East!

It's not often that MRJEFF can do his small part in this whole corrupt networking/logrolling thing, but longtime chum Dan Renkin sends word of recent career doings:

New York, NY: Caucasian Chalk Kurosawa (fight direction) "There are cool sword fights (by Dan Renkin and Brad Lemons), and grade-A nifty plastic-and-fishnet costumes (Virigina Tuller) and a healthy dose of East Village Wierdness."

Bridgeport, CT: Shakespeare at the Zoo - A Midsummer Night's Dream (Nicholas Bottom) "I would be remiss if I did not point out that the entire cast did an outstanding job. Dan Renkin as Nicholas Bottom, the pompous actor who is turned into a donkey, delivers an absolutely hilarious performance. Thanks in large part to his performance, the park not only was filled with exotic sounds and sights, but also with the happiest sound in the world - children's laughter. Every time Bottom hee-hawed or spoke donkinese, children in the audience laughed without reserve."

Boston, MA: As Bees in Honey Drown "Fight choreographers Brad Lemons and Dan Renkin construct a very convincing melee."

monkeyview.net

Random photo sites provide a voyeuristic thrill. Some people are artsy and talented, while some are...well, they have a rawer talent.

(Monkeyview.net)

Brouwerij Henri Maes

Brewery sign, Brugges, Belgium
01 August 2004

The Atomium

Atomium (8/2/04, modified photo)

Statue of Bela Bartok, in Brussels, Belgium

(8/2/04, modified photo)

Meanwhile, in Boston...

PS - all this time I have been pretty well insulated from the news. So, sadly, I have missed all the Dem convention coverage. I really hope C-Span (and/or its website) will continue to make the speeches available.

PPS - it's kind of annoying traveling with a bunch of goddamn red-staters who think that George W. is just the cat's meow, and who interpret an attack on the ability of the man to be president as an attack on the USA and on themselves personally.

In fact, while Europeans are almost universally against the re-election of Bush, there is a very positive attitude toward America and Americans here.

So: Go Kerry! Go USA! Go World!

Still in Europa

Well, we have come to the end of the biking portion of the journey, and are back on the bus. MRJEFF is blogging from Brugge, Belgium right now.

It has been a rough week for your old pal, as he either caught a bit of a bug, or encountered some mild food poisoning. Either way, it's no way to spend one's vacation. Luckily this hasn't kept a trooper like me down and out, at least not both at the same time.

By the way - if this is Europe, where are all the undraped breasts at? You'd think they'd be everywhere, the way this place is advertised.

Anyhoo, that's it for now. More when I get back to the other side of the ocean. Pictures, too.

MRJEFF
Brugges, Belgium
01/08/04 2:09 PM

Overseas with MRJEFF

Greetings from Friesland (Fryslân) from Your Pal MRJEFF. We're on the second day of the Big Bike Ride around the northern Netherlands. Yesterday we were lucky enough to ride for several kilometers in the rain through sheep shit. Today has been sunnier, and the sheep have been confined to areas off the bikepath, so I guess that's better, if perhaps less authentic. Here's hoping my stuff dries out soon!

Oops -- gotta go. Lunch break is almost over, and we have 11 km more, which should be a comparative walk in the park. Of course, Langdon would probably leave me in the dust...

Until next time,
MRJEFF the cyclist
Sloten, the Nethelands
26/07/04 01:41 PM

Downtown

An Inappropriate Comparison

Now then. Is it just me, or does UPS's new logo remind you of Adolph Hitler?




I'm just sayin', is all...

Where's MRJEFF?

Over the next two weeks Your Humble Narrator will be on a trip around his ancestors' homeland.

By bicycle, no less.

One hopes there will be opportunity to Euroblog at some point or another. Sadly, there won't be much about the Democratic Convention. Perhaps another blogger will take up the slack on that.

One also hopes that MRJEFF doesn't fall into a canal and drown. (Be not afraid, Gentle Reader - if this does happen, you can be sure that you'll read about it in this blog, with pictures!)

Bridging the Bay

A fascinating website from UC Berkeley: Bridging the Bay Online Exhibit

Especially interesting is the Unbuilt Projects section, which includes plans for additional bay crossings, alternate visions for the Golden Gate and Bay Bridges, and the incredible Reber Plan, which would have dammed the Bay and created two huge freshwater lakes.

(If you think the Reber Plan would have been a monstrosity, then you don't even want to think about NAWAPA.)

The Smoke from a Distant Fire

The fire started just over the ridge from our home, fortunately on the other side of the 14 freeway, which acted as a firebreak for most of Saturday. The air was a strange Armageddon-like orange colour and one of our neighbours came over to see if we were packing up our valuables yet (we weren't). On Sunday morning the fire was moving away from us and seemed less of a threat so my husband and I went to see friends at Redondo Beach, mostly to get away from the smoke and ash, which is everywhere, the ash piling up in little drifts like snow. While we were sitting on the beach, which is a good 45 miles away we suddenly saw a huge plume of smoke go up in the distance and knew it had to be the fire again.

Susanna Luck, Santa Clarita, USA

Rashomon - The Musical

From the world of the theatre comes news of the upcoming world premiere of R Shomon:

A park. A thief. A priest. A psychic. A murder. A miracle. A lie. The truth. From the composer/librettist of Broadway’s The Wild Party and Marie Christine, comes a world premiere new musical, suggested from the short stories of Ryunosuke Akutagawa, that explores the many facets of reality, faith and love with a contemporary, lush score.

The cast will include Six Feet Under's Michael C. Hall and Tom Wopat.

...


MRJEFF has spoken with several people who have seen rehearsals, but reports of the play's quality, and even its plotline are oddly conflicting...

Thomas Frank in the NYT

Wonderful op-ed by Thomas Frank, Failure Is Not an Option, It's Mandatory in the 7/16 NYT. Why would the right-wingers in Congress put forward a constitutional amendment they knew was doomed to overwhelming failure? "Losing is prima facie evidence that the basic conservative claim is true: that the country is run by liberals; that the world is unfair; that the majority is persecuted by a sinister elite."

Peligro! Abejas!

Your pal MRJEFF learned a new word today: abejas.

...

Abejas?



AHHHHH! BEES!!!

desolation

Iceland: Nökkvi Elíasson photographs deserted farms (and more).

HULK'S DIARY

Everybody Has a Blog, Part XXXII: HULK'S DIARY

Boxer for Senate 2004

You may have heard that your pal MRJEFF recently attended a Barbara Boxer-oriented event chez Rashomon.

The junior senator from California was on C-SPAN this evening, arguing against the "Federal Marriage Amendment". And I have never been prouder of my senator.

ONE WEEK ONLY! Metric: Combat Baby @ iTunes

This week's free iTunes song: Metric's Combat Baby.

Of course, those of you who are still bound to the mp3 format can download this song from Epitonic.

Whichever you choose, MRJEFF recommends most highly!

Police Chase

What fun! Another police chase in Southern California! When your pal MRJEFF first tuned in, the alleged criminal was on southbound on the 5, moving past Dodger Stadium. (Interestingly, due to post-9/11 air traffic rules, the news choppers had to give the stadium a wide berth.)

And now the perp has moved from the westbound 10 to the 405 south toward LAX. And, incidentally, past MRJEFF's Culver City abode. Your Humble Narrator counted four-ish helicopters following, but was unable to see how many ground units were en chasse.

The cameras had to break away due to cloud cover over LAX, but soon resumed pursuit over Inglewood city streets, and then to Redondo Beach, where the suspect abandoned his vehicle, ran through the streets with a gun to his head, and, thankfully, quickly surrendered peacefully. The system works. Local geography lesson complete.

John Derbyshire Sucks (part 17)

My goodness, how I hate John Derbyshire:

Although, back of the smile, there is the dull, sad realisation that our people could never be so clever and devious. I get the same feeling about the War on Terror. Not only does the Devil have all the best tunes, he has the best tricks, too.

See, the problem with us conservatives is, we're too nice. Just don't know how to think dirty.

Hm.

soulbinder: We are living in 1984.*Reaches for Orwel

Here's a clever analysis of one passage from 1984, by some Live Journal-ist.

Designs on the White House T-Shirts

and other t-shirts, at Designs on the White House.

Tres Chicas.org

MP3 of the day: Sweetwater (right-click to save) from Tres Chicas.

The Most Ironic Street Name in Los Angeles

Ferris Wheel / St. Gerard Majella

Ferris wheel, at the carnival at St. Gerard Majella church, on Inglewood near Culver.
Gerard Majella is the patron saint of, among other things, pregnant women and the pro-life movement.

Ronald W. Reagan is Still Dead

Revisit the past! Remember earlier this month when Reagan died and a MRJEFF operative took in the scene down at the funeral home? Other bloggers (1, 2) were also on the prowl, exploiting the national tragedy for their own selfish purposes.

Mayhem at Braddock and Duquesne!

An accident! Excitement in Culver City!


Gosh - I feel like WeeGee!


But am I just exploiting these people's misery?


Well, it's such a nice day today. And I'm sure nobody was hurt, right?

Peter Piper Picked a Peck of Pickled Peckers

From the Peter-Piper-Picked-a-Peck-of-Pickled-Peckers department:

Here it is, 9:58 Monday morning. Somehow I just know that this is going to set the tone for the entire week.

Another glorious Saturday in the Promised Land.

New Product Review

At the ad agency where MRJEFF works, we were recently dropped off a large supply of herbal beverages from the Carpe Diem beverage consortium, with the suggestion that we avail ourselves of the opportunity to sample the three products Kombucha, Gingkgo, and Kefir.

Kefir, with its fermented elderberry juice base, resembled most closely a cherry or raspberry Tootsie Pop™ (in beverage form). Most of my staff agreed, this was the least nauseating most palatable of the Carpe Diem drinks. It was very thick - the official MRJEFF suggestion is to use this as either a cough syrup, or to drizzle over pancakes. 4/10.

Ginkgo: most of MRJEFF's employees and associates decreed this to be vile and undrinkable. What do they know, these kids these days, with their Britney Spears and their tongue piercings? This one vaguely resembles a somewhat earthy sarsaparilla. Plus, it make MRJEFF mind work...uh...gooder.... 7/10.

Kombucha: I am sure that, in the proper combination, a beverage comprised of Hibiscus Bloom, Rose Hips, Blackberry Leaf, European Elder Bloom, Pepperming Leaf, and Lemon Balm Leave could be non-sucky. But in this combination, it basically tastes like a blackberry candy stick and a mouthful of toothpaste. Plus, it's got Lactobacillus casei ("Culture in LLV agar medium followed by ELISA using monoclonal antibodies specific for LCS was able to detect the organism in faeces. Using this method, we studied the faecal recovery of LCS in individuals who drank 125 ml of fermented milk which contained 10(10) live LCS for 3 days. The mean recovery was about 10(7) live bacteria per gram of faeces, indicating that LCS survived transit through the gastrointestinal tract after ingestion of the fermented milk." WTF?) Nevertheless, 2/10

SPEED

From the We-Just-Don't-Get-The-Internet Department:

LINKED SITES AND ADVERTISING

If you are interested in creating hypertext links to this Site, you must contact Business & Legal Affairs of Speed at 10000 Santa Monica Boulevard, Los Angeles, California 90067 before doing so. In establishing hypertext links, you must not represent in any way, expressly or by implication, that you have received the endorsement, sponsorship or support of this Site or Speed, including its respective employees, agents, directors, officers and shareholders.

Come and get me, copper!

Charlie's Soapbox

Blast From The Past: Charlie Daniels has a very bad feeling about our involvement in Kosovo.

Half-mast

Late this afternoon, your pal MRJEFF went on down to Gates Kingsley & Gates Moeller Murphy Funeral Directors (aka The Little Chapel of the Dawn) in order to see just what-all was going on down at the place where Mr. Reagan's body is being kept until it is sent to the Capitol to lie in state. (I had recognized the building from some of the live shots on TV. It's on 20th Street in Santa Monica, which is a very hand route for north-south travel if you want to avoid Lincoln Blvd.) Both 20th Street and Arizona were blocked off for a block or so in all directions from the intersection, and various newsvans were there, ready for live shots just in case. There were around a hundred people there, most of whom were lined up awaiting their turn to be allowed past the police tape to place flowers, or a flag, or some other token next to the fountain in front of the funeral home.

Your humble narrator meditated upon the situation for a short while. And then went to the Gap.

The Fourth Estate

Homemade memorial

Gifts from the people. (Note, especially, the rocket-shaped balloon.)

A Live Remote

A Sunday trip to Santa Monica

It was a very nice day, so MRJEFF decided to take a nice little walk in Santa Monica.


He saw some bright pink bougainvillea down near the beach.

(Actually, by this point I had gone down the giant stairway at Fourth and Adelaide, and was now in Pacific Palisades.)

What's goin' on out MRJEFF's window? 

The Chris Matthews Show: Transcripts

The Chris Matthews Show has finally deigned to post its transcript of their show from a couple weeks back. Take it away, Peggy:

MATTHEWS: What's the picture of the year for this election? What's going to be the iconic picture this year, like--like that speech at Normandy was for President Reagan back in '84?

Ms. NOONAN: The picture of the year will be a wire service picture that will win a Pulitzer Prize that captures in some interesting way the fact that Bush, under terrible pressure, has been dogged, and has stood by his guns.

Ms. NOONAN: It hasn't been taken yet.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

MPAA Ratings Fun

MPAA Ratings Fun With A.O. Scott! "'The Day After Tomorrow' is rated Pg-13. Millions of people die, but nobody swears, copulates, undresses or takes drugs."

More jacaranda blogging 

The Chris Matthews Show: Transcripts

For more than a week now your pal MRJEFF has been trying to confirm something particularly stupid he heard ultra-Bush-brownnoser Peggy Noonan say on the Chris Matthews Show (don't worry, Gentle Reader - MRJEFF was merely flipping through the channels at the time). But the show must have gotten wind of these efforts. How else can you explain their refusal to add the 5/16 show to their transcripts page?

We will keep you posted.

Cokehead

(more here) 

God Damned Fucking Idiot Pundits

From the pot-calling-the-kettle-black department: A Fox News discussion between host Eric Burns and syndicated blowhard Cal Thomas:

ERIC BURNS: Al Neuharth, moderate, founder of "USA Today" says this: "The war in Iraq is the biggest military mess miscreated in the Oval Office and miscarried by the Pentagon in my 80-year lifetime."  Neuharth wants the troops out of Iraq and President Bush out of office.  Neuharth says Bush should not run for re-election.

Cal, "USA Today," largest circulation of any paper in the country, not a liberal fashion by any means.  What does it mean that the founder of this paper has turned on the administration?

CAL THOMAS:  Nothing.  He's no Walter Cronkite and this is not Vietnam.  To make an over-the-top comment like Al Neuharth did that this is worse than ever, ignores Vietnam and the experience, which was a far worse war with far more casualties.  Being an opinion writer is like being a perpetual adolescent.  You can have opinions on everything and take responsibility for nothing.  His opinions don't mean anything.  They don't have all the facts.

Mr. Thomas is, of course, himself an "opinion writer". I'll let you create your own syllogisms.

BURNS:  There are some shows on all-news cable in which the opinions do matter though, don't you think?

THOMAS:  Oh yes, on ours, of course, and including the one I just I gave.

BURNS:  Not to be too defensive.

No, not at all...

A Trip to Amoeba

Well, I finally broke down and did it. I drove on out to Hollywood, to shop at Amoeba Records. Everybody's always talking about how great it is, so I figured, what the heck.

First things first: I still hate Hollywood. Not the concept of Hollywood as it has come to be known; the symbol of American anything-as-long-as-it-makes-a-buck cultural hegemony. No, I'm fine with that. Rather, I hate Hollywood the neighborhood. There's too much traffic, no parking, dirt and litter and graffiti and discarded chewing gum everywhere.

I can't say as I'm too keen on Amoeba yet, either. Oh, sure, it's huge, and the selection is amazing. I'll definitely go back, some day. But the store is completely crowded with heroin-addicted hipsters, with their trucker caps and eyebrow piercings, and deliberately obnoxious hairstyles. Call me a heretic, but I'll keep Aron's as my primary source. Give me bright, happy Highland over depressing, dismal Cahuenga any day of the week, my man.

Hm? Oh, yeah:

Baja Sessions, Chris Isaak
Ghost Train, The Hot Club of Cowtown
that dog. and Totally Crushed Out!, that dog.
The Indestructible Beat of Soweto: Volume One

$35.61

Jacaranda Fever - Catch It!

Man oh man, are the jacaranda in bloom this month! Imagine, if you will, (this photo)*10^6, all over the Westside. Explosions of lilac everywhere! 

Brunette Alexandra Kerry

Oh, sure, Rashy will faithfully cut-and-paste every bit of Cannes info his cyclist pal sends him. But what about the truly important news from the Festival, Matt?

One Handsome Devil!

MRJEFF enjoys a fine cuppa joe! 

Rashomon

Well, it's waaaay past time for me to have mentioned this, but Rashomon has its very own correspondent reporting from Cannes, known only as "George the Cyclist". Langdon fans GreenCine Daily have, of course, taken notice, and others have begun posting links to Rashomon too.

Spleen? Pancreas?

Oh, the joy of a trip to the beach -- sand, surf, and spooge!

Bouncy!

In our continuing effort to chronicle the very best of the internet, MRJEFF3000 brings you a short clip from very-nearly-eighteen Lindsay Lohan's movie Mean Girls.

Enjoy.